[DYAB 1512] Fw: Tawa naman diyan..

 

     

Subject:  TAWA NAMAN DIYAN   Mrs. Tanoy is very kuripot when her husband died, she inquired with the newspaper, asking the price for the obituary. The ad taker said: '300 pesos for 5 words.' She said: 'Pwede ba 2 words lang? 'Tanoy dead'' Ad taker: 'No mam. 5 words is the minimum.' After thinking for a while, Mrs. Tanoy said: 'Ok, para sulit, ilagay mo, 'TANOY DEAD, TOYOTA FOR SALE ' ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Boy: Nay may ulam ba? Nanay: Tignan mo na lang dyan sa ref, anak. Boy: Eh wala naman tayong ref, di ba? Nanay: O, e di wala tayong ulam. Konting common sense naman dyan, anak! ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ Caloy: Tay ,di ba sabi mo bibigyan mo ko ng P100 pag pumasa ako sa Math? Tatay: Oo. Bakit, pumasa ka ba? Caloy: Gud news, tay! Di ka na gagastos ng P100. ------------ --------- --------- --------- -------- - --------- Kano (trying to speak Tagalog): Meg-kanow isang kilow mang-gow? Tindero: One way. Kano: Meg-kanow? Tindero: I sed ONE WAY. Kano: Aynowng ibig sabeyhin ng one way? Tindero: Isang daan. Understang?! ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Erap: Kalokohan! Di ako naniniwala! Walang taong ganun kataba! Loi: San ang balitang yan? Erap: Dito sa dyaryo. Sabi; 'British tourist lost 2000 pounds.' ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- MMDA (with pen and ticket to a traffic violator): Name? Foreigner Driver: Wilhelm Von Corgrinski Papakovitz. MMDA: Ahhh okay...(sabay tago ticket)...Next time be careful, ok? ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------ BF: Sunduin kita mamaya ha. Bubusina nalang ako pag nasa harap nako ng bahay nyo. GF: Cge. Anong sasakyan ang dala mo? BF: Wala. Busina lang... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Nag-aapply si Tomas na security guard... Interviewer: Ang kailangan namin ay taong laging may suspicious mind, highly alert, insistent personality, strong sense of hearing with a killer instinct. Sa tingin mo ba qualified ka? Tomas: Sa palagay ko po hindi. Pwede po=2 0bang yun misis ko nalang ang mag-apply? ------------ ----- Always remember, when SHE cancels a date, she HAS TO. But....when HE cancels a date......   he HAS TWO. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Junior: Nay, bibili ako ng HIGH CAKE. Nanay: Hindi high cake, anak. HOT CAKE yun. Junior: Ok nay, watever. Pahingi nalang ng barya. Nanay: Sige, kumuha ka nalang dyan sa SOLDIER BAG ko. ------------ --------- --------- - Pasyente ... magkano ang facelift? Doktora ... complete treatment ay P145,000 Pasyente ... mahal naman !!! ano bang pinakamurang treatment para magmukha akong bata? Doktora ... heto tsupon, P20 lang!! ------------ --------- ORDER Customer .... waiter! bakit ang tagal ng order ko? ilan ang cook nyo dito? Waiter .... ay, sir, wala pu kame cuk dito...pipse lang po!! ------------ --------- ------- PROBLEMA NGA Pasyente ... Doc, may problema ako...tuwing alas otso ng umaga dumudumi ako... Doktor ... so, anong problema doon? Pasyente ... Eh alas nuwebe po ako nagigising. ------------ --------- -------- ACCIDENT A lawyer driving on a highway notices a crowd in an intersection. With his urge to get into the thick crowd and see the action, he shouted, 'I'M THE SON OF THE VICTIM.' Upon hearing, the people made way for him to get through. There he saw, bloody and helpless lying in front of the people...a pig bumped by a trailer truck! ------------ ------- PINTURA Erap ... Honey, nagpintura ako ng banyo. Loi ... Bakit dalawa ang suot mong jacket, ang init, init !!! Erap ... Sabi kasi sa label, for best results put on 2 coats. ------------ --------- - MANNY PAQUIAO Reporter ... Manny, anong bill ang gagawin mo kapag congressman ka na? Manny ... Ano'ng bill? e di yung tomotonog pagkatapos ng bawa't round sa bukseng? Get your new Email address! Grab the Email name you've always wanted before someone else does! New Email addresses available on Yahoo! Get the Email name you've always wanted on the new @ymail and @rocketmail. Hurry before someone else does!

---

Try the new Yahoo! Messenger 10 Beta
Now with real-time updates, enhanced video-calls and more!

--~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~
To post, send email to dyab1512@googlegroups.com
Visit Us at http://groups.google.com/group/dyab1512?hl=en
DYAB Cebu Live Webcast:  http://tinyurl.com/abcebu
DYAB Web Log:  http://dyab-cebu.blogspot.com/
Chat with Us: Our account name is dyab1512 for Yahoo Messenger, Google Talk, ICQ, Skype, GMail Chat and MSN Messenger
-~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---