Thursday, August 04, 2005

Family First

Ano kayang halaga ng tagumpay sa career if it has been achieved at the
expense of the family. What profit does a man have kung mawawala naman ang
kanyang pamilya? OO nga, meron siyang salapi na milyon ang halaga, magandang
mansyon, travels around the world, and cavorts with an array of girls,
women, and ladies, pero naman ang kapalit kung ikaw naman ay being hated by
your daughters and is the mortal enemy of your sons. Can success in career
really make up for failure at home? Which then is more important, wealth or
family. A great number of us would readily say family. Pero totoo kaya na
ang ating sinasabi ay ating ginagawa. But do we walk our talk ika nga? Are
we willing to translate our mindsets into concrete actions? Day by day, we
are bombarded by 52 million dollar questions, Sino ba ang mahalaga ang mga
anak ko o ang trabaho ko.

To my fellow employees, I don't know how you react out there or would Answer
my questions. In my case, as an accountant who always spend overtime in the
office to be able to submit deadline reports come month-end or cut-off
period, I have made unforgivable mistakes. If I have to live my life again,
I would need to overhaul my priorities, to rechannel the efforts that I Have
been exerting with passions and commitment. I thought all along na ang Lahat
ng ginagawa kong pagpapahirap at pagtratrabaho to the max to get a
promotion, I am doing it all for the family. But I was wrong. Today I know
better. When my wife or daughter is on the phone I make sure that I attend
to them first, never mind if there are urgent things to attend or papers to
submit to my superior, after all they can wait for 10! minutes.....but if I
deny the 10 minutes that is so important to them, it would have a lasting
effect than to my Boss who might be replaced in a couple of years.

My family is my top priority, period. It is not a choice between my family
and my career. MY FAMILY IS THE REASON WHY I NEED A CAREER. My career will
come and go, employers can come and go but one's family Will remain even
beyond the grave. They even take care of our graves. Noon kahit mayroon
affairs sa school ang aking mga anak, I'd tend to preponderate toward the
official duty and delegate the affairs of my kids to my wife. I used to
operate on the paradigm that I should focus on the duty first before
pleasure. Now I know that MY first duty is toward my loved ones. I should
put my time where my heart belongs.

Today if I will to do it all over again, I'd reverse my priorities. My son
will only graduate once in elementary and only once in high school, I will
make sure I will be there, I will file my vacation leave and if my Boss
rejected it because I need to attend to a company function where I am
required to attend, I would still go to my kids graduation no matter what
the consequences are. This time I am willing to become an average corporate
officer, a so-so business executive but a great father. I'm willing to be
reprimanded by my Boss for a late report but not hated by a daughter for not
remembering her birthday every year.....na ilalabas ko siya the whole day
and cherish the moments every minute dahil alam ko hindi ko na maibabalik
ito kapag lumaki na siya at kung gawin ko man later, baka huli na. There are
more important matters compared to corporate business meetings, Family peace
and love- these are the ones that matter most.

BUT I SPEAK ONLY FOR MYSELF. I DO NOT IMPOSE VALUES ON YOU GUYS OUT THERE.

If you think possessions are more important than family, go ahead. Spend 20
hours in the office, bring home your corporate work. Neglect your wife..
don't spend quality time with your kids. Don't attend important family
gatherings. Find work that you are away for a week and only meet your family
every week-ends, oh what a waste. Delegate raising the children to your
spouse. Leave the young kids to the nanny. Let the driver brings your kids
to school. Ask someone to represent in your son college graduation. If you
find something wrong at home, don't mind it, anyway your concentration is in
your job. You have your career remember? Don't greet your father and mother
on their anniversary. Spend all your time in the company. Baka mawala ang
tiwala ng Boss mo sa iyo sayang ang pinagpaguran mo ng matagal. If you have
aging parents, don't visit them. enjoy your career in isolation. Drink,
dance, be merry, But in the end, you lose all the love ones who love you
more, after neglecting! them. No wife, no kids, no family. you are alone and
pretending to be happy. don't blame your company. don't lay the Burden on
your Boss. Hindi ba, You made the choice? You opted to put more value on
your career. Dahil sabi mo pinaghirapan mo lahat ito and pangarap mo na ito
simula pagkabata dahil mahirap ka lang ikamu...gusto mong yumaman. You
gambled and you lost.

I know of an executive na masyadong depressed...every week lang siyang umuwi
sa pamilya niya. Week-ends lang niya nalalaro ang mga bata kung minsan
required pa mag-stay ng sabado sa office, who finds no meaning in his life,
he's got the money, a beautiful wife who according to him might be hiding
something from him (you know what I mean) and the kids are not genuinely
closed to him, for no apparent reason he had pulled the trigger to his head.
He's got everything and he lost everything. that is the tragedy of it all.

As for me, I know better. After all the pains, the burdens of mistaken
priorities, I have made my choice. Anytime, anywhere, my family comes first.
My career, my business, my outside clients, all my other pursuits are only
means to the end of all my sacrifices, my wife, my sons, my daughters, my
family. I shall thus manage my various objectives well. there shall not be
conflicting objective anymore. For I now know clearly my prioroties and
shall be faithful to them. I shall be willing to give them up; excess money,
much comfort, travels, and girls for and in the name of the family. That is
simple and straightforward.

PS. Are you aware that if we die tomorrow, the company that we are working
for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family we left
behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of
it, we pour ourselves more into work than to our own family, an unwise
investment indeed, don't you think? And we often treat strangers and
coworkers better than members of our family.

No comments: